My life the last 3 weeks has felt like something out of a movie and about the only movie I can think of to compare it to is 4 Weddings and A Funeral but in my life it has been 3 Funerals and A Wedding.
First,on September 23, was the death of a wonderful lady I had the pleasure of working with at the ICF/MR where I see clients. She had been employed at McCalls Chapel for 49 years and every resident there knew her and she knew them. It was very difficult for some of the residents, especially those that worked with everyday on the yard crew. The day after the news of her death I had to do 3 groups, one included the boys from the yard crew and it was a very emotionally draining day. During those times I always have to set my own feelings aside so I can help others cope with the feelings they are having and I don't always have time to attend to my own grief and process it. I had just started trying to process my own grief when I got news of a dear college friend of mine being involved in a motorcycle accident.
|Calvin - October 1992|
On September 27th I got word that my friend Calvin had been in a motorcycle accident and I being the optimist I am thought he would be fine. Later in the day I found out that he had succumbed to his injuries and was no longer with us. Calvin was one of "my boys" as I have always called them and this hit me hard. Back in the days of college there were a group of us that were close. I had 2-3 roommates and the boys were at our house all the time, especially on Sundays when I would cook dinner. Luckily I was able to go with my friend Bryant and his wife Stephanie down to Wichita Falls Texas for the funeral on October 2nd, so I didn't have to ride by myself. To be honest I don't know how I would have handled the drive back home alone. Since Calvin was a police officer in Wichita Falls there was standing room only for the services. He was laid to rest in Oklahoma City and we decided to go to the interment because we were worried about Stavie and how he was holding up. Stavie and Calvin were roommates in college and were best friends ever since then. After that we went to Calvin's mom's house and visited with the family for a few hours. I know I had a harder time dealing with the death of Calvin than Jan for many reasons and I still feel myself asking all the why's and if's that occur when we lose people we love.
A few days after Calvin's funeral I was talking to a friend and I told her "death seems to come in 3's and I'm just waiting for the other shoe to drop". When I said that I did mean it but I was also hoping it would not be true but then....the shoe dropped.
|Larry, Wendy and I in Las Vegas - Aug 2001|
On October 8th I got a phone call from my friend Amy, which was odd since she knew it was the middle of the work day, and she said she had noticed I hadn't been on Facebook and I told her I had been busy. She proceeded to say "I didn't want you to open Facebook and find out about this like I did so I thought it was better that you heard this from a friend" and tells me that my friend Larry had passed away on October 6th. I was glad I was sitting down when she told me because I literally felt myself feel faint and I think I would have went down to the ground. I had tried to call Larry the previous week and he didn't answer his phone and I kept meaning to try again but something would pop up and then I would remember when it was too late to call. I first met Larry in Yahoo Chat back in 1998 and there were a group of us that loved to chat together. We moved on to Yahoo Messenger and our group dwindled down to 4...Larry, Joani, Wendy and I, and we would chat almost every night even if was just for a few minutes. We used the voice chat feature, well they did, I did the typing because I could type faster than talk. We exchanged Christmas presents a few years and I always made them ornaments. I always sent Larry cards I made and he always fawned over them. I have never known anyone who loved getting mail as much as Larry did. Anytime I went on vacation I always sent him post cards, whether it be from somewhere in the Caribbean or even just Houston Larry always knew he could be expecting a postcard. I always knew when it was the Christmas season because for the last 10 years Larry has had a loaf of Stollen sent to me from Dinkels Bakery in Chicago. It was a tradition in his family and he wanted to share that tradition with me. It meant so much to me I even did a "Stollen, not stolen" layout that was posted back in 2011. There is so much I could tell you about Larry but right now I don't think I can type anymore about the sorrows that have happened in the last few weeks.
BFF Carmen had been planning on coming to visit in October and I just knew I needed her to visit more than ever and was hoping she would be able to make it...I needed something to distract me and keep me from sitting home alone and slumping into a depressed mood. Luckily things worked out and she let me know she would be arriving on Sunday October 11th!! We had grand plans to make our Christmas cards, make some t-shirts and other projects with the heat press and any other great crafting project we could think of...notice I said "had".
On Monday October 12th we got some news that would change any and all plans that we had....and right now I have some other things to do so I'll shall have to post that story tomorrow!